Change is good!

Life is full of heartache, but there is also the beauty afforded by love! 

I treasure the relationships that have helped me become the woman I am today.

 At times, I've longed to be back in the arms of those whose purpose in my life had long ago ended.

For me, the thought of moving forward has always been tied to loss

and having had very little all my life, 

the thought seemed unbearable.

Today as I cleared my bathroom of all clutter,
I found myself feeling free.

The act of letting go is more than just therapeutic...its necessary.

As I found myself overwhelmed
by a 13 gallon trash bag filled with empty shampoo bottles

I wondered
why in the world had I gone so long without a purge.

Absent of substance,
 I continued to hold on to them...

as if by doing so,
some how I would still somehow benefit.

I love the men of my past,
but I'm starting to see how they too have to be let go.

Not so much to make room for the next, 

but to allow myself time to breathe...

To enjoy the absence before the next great love arrives.

To be alone with my thoughts instead of overwhelmed by them.

Yet one, 

He remains the thing I find hardest to let go..

His presence fills me with hopefulness

Forced to endure his absence... indifference grows

His love of life is intoxicating,

but there is little if any room ever made for me

So tonight, 

as I clear out this bathroom

I am going to also do the work of clearing out my heart and soul

Tossing away the thoughts and hopes of our past,

I'm praying will give me a chance to finally rest!