Young, Gifted, and Black...revisiting a dream

"There is but one cause of human failure. And that is man's lack of faith in his true self." -

William James, American Psychologist and Philosopher

I never could have ever imagined the degree to which graduate school would change me.

Waking this morning, I found it hard to move...

I love my clients...but I hate the context in which I serve them.

Like Dorthy in the wizard of oz,

I find myself confused and lost.

With no TOTO to hold on to,

 this seems the most loneliest state.

I look at my faculty and think

I hate these people and everything the stand for...

What happened to psychologist's that truly cared?

What happened to earning a grade based on your knowledge and 

not based on how much the instructor likes you.

While I try not to think thoughts of harm towards them...

I find myself consumed with thoughts of their demise.

What would happen if APA were made aware of their actions.

But if nothing else has proven true since my time as a graduate student

I've learned that those in positions to protect...

those meant to uphold that which is right...

when it comes to academic institutions...

the integrity is often lacking...and atrocities are left to multiple!

I need to find strength to fight back,

to earn this degree that 3 years ago I traveled here to attain

but how can I when my faith is so lacking

the girl who knew she was destined to do this

now finds it hard to even speak her thoughts

These people I feel have ruined me.

Have taken the kind, happy-go-lucky, 

brilliant girl with dreams of improving the lives of others

and beaten her down to a shell of who she once was...

I've decided to turn back,
to return to the truth I learned as a child.
I am more gifted than these people can see
and with or without their approval,
my GOD will help me persevere through ...